Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Classiest Insults of All Time, Part 2

"He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright

"I've just learned about his illness.  Let's hope it's nothing trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb

"He is not only dull himself; he is the cause of dullness in others." - Samuel Johnson

"He is simply a shiver looking for a spine to run up." - Paul Keating

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Charles, Count Talleyrand

"He loves nature in spite of what it did to him." - Forrest Tucker

"Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?" - Mark Twain

"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." - Mae West

"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." -  Oscar Wilde

"He uses statistics as a drunken man uses lamp-posts... for support rather than illumination." - A. Lang

"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening.  But this wasn't it." - Groucho Marx

TODAY'S GOOD NEWS:  Two hot tub leaks fixed just in time for the long weekend!