Saturday, October 15, 2011

The Moped and The Ferrari

Where's me braces, Beulah, I'm goin' fer a ride!
An elderly man on a Moped, looking about 80 years old, pulls up next to a doctor at the last street light on the way out of town.  The old man looks over at the sleek, shiny car and asks, "What kind of car ya got there, Sonny?"  The doctor replies, "A Ferrari.  It can do 220 miles an hour!"  The old man asks, "Mind if I take a look inside?"  "Not at all," replies the doctor.  So the old man pokes his head in the window and looks around.  Then, sitting back on his Moped the old man says, "That's a pretty nice car, all right .... but I'll stick with my Moped.  It's fast enough for me!"  Just then the light changes, so the doctor decides to show the old man just what his Ferrari can do.  He floors it and within 30 seconds the speedometer reads 150 mph.  Suddenly, he notices a dot in his rear view mirror.  It seems to be getting closer!  He slows down to see what it could be and WHOOSH, something whips by him.  He floors it again and takes the Ferrari up to 180 mph.  Soon he sees that it's the old man on the Moped!  Amazed that the Moped could pass his Ferrari back there, he gives it more gas and passes the Moped at 200 mph, and he's feeling pretty good - until he looks in his mirror and sees the old man gaining on him again!  Astounded by the speed of this old guy, he stomps the gas pedal and takes the Ferrari all the way up to 220 mph.  Not ten seconds later, he sees the Moped bearing down on him again!  The Ferrari is flat out, and there's nothing he can do!  Suddenly, the Moped plows into the back of his Ferrari, so the doc slows down and pulls over.  The doctor stops, jumps out and unbelievably the old man is still alive.  He runs up to the banged-up old guy and says, "Is there anything I can do for you ?"  Out of breath and pale as a ghost, the old man whispers, "Just unhook my suspenders from your side view mirror!"  (With thanks to Schauerte, "The Shack")

The Good News:  I don't own a Moped or wear suspenders - yet!  Have a good weekend.